I’m sick of believing. I’m tired of waiting for something that isn't gonna happen. Sometimes I’m just sick and tired of living. I’m done believing in some “God”. I feel like I’m wasting energies when I scream at him. It’s like fighting with the wall, it’s a fight against nothing. But then I regret and I feel bad for yelling him. I hate feeling like this so much. I hate the person that I became. The most of the time I feel that I don’t have a life; I feel that I’m just living a permanent karma. Why some others can be happy and I don’t? Why other people can be mean and then nothing bad happens to them? Am I the only one who’s paying for something? I have so many questions around my head every day, I just don’t think I might have an answer. I know that I’m a dramatic guy. I’ve always been like this, and I know that there in the world exist some other people that have worse lives than mine, but it doesn’t mean my life is cute and happy. I don’t know what to do anymore, this entire thing makes me feel like I worth nothing. When I want something I always have to fight so hard, and mostly, at the end, I don’t get what I was fighting for.
I don’t wanna do drugs; I don’t want to harm myself anymore. I don’t know why it’s so difficult for me to be happy. But I tend to think that maybe I’m overreacting and I just need someone by my side.
"Trying hard to fill the emptiness, the piece is gone and the puzzle undone" Beautiful-Christina Aguilera.
